I tried to say.. don't go

You don't have to be lonely, in order to be ALONE

Close your eyes, consider the planet, see it revolving
Imagine the humans which must reside in every single corner of our planet
Every place inhabited, by distinct societies
Amongst those you will find several members who bring themselves up alone
And if you look deep in your heart, you'll even notice
the brave few, who don't need a society in order to cure something
which only ever changes when you Change

Learn to be 'Responsible for your Rose.' - Little Prince

Emotional you

She says your emotions run like a river
That they turn and toil, and reveal a whole philosophy
They contemplate life, and question even curiosity

She said a lot of things to me, till inside I took a clue
I saw below what she failed to see, and that was the change which laid amongst you
You personified that change, day in and night out.
But she could never see it, damn she hasn't changed since the 1993 drought

She fails to see that even leaves, trees, and the sky change their form and motion
every day, even in possible minutes.
She only sees the hair and make up she puts on. Like clay, moulded in what the world expected her to be

She thinks she is free, as though her fake eyes don't betray the opposing
She thinks she has the right to play, and make you lose, because your what she calls emotional
Ironically, it is her, who needs you to throw her emotions astray
the ones that make her insecure, and lie within her everyday

She looks at her reflection with a false glare
for unable to change, she thinks there is no other way

She then uses you, to throw some of her baggage into your life
so that her life feels good, and her emotions fly high

It is you who lets it be, pretending to not notice
Yet I know, you know, what she does
And yet you discard it as a burden carried for children

I ask you today, if those children were yours, would you let them stray
I know you will not answer, but I also know that you would never allow them
in such a manner to behave

Hence tell me why such a major difference lies, when children are unconditional
but yours lie at an advantage
for yours get the care, you save for them
and the rest become spoiled like children who have no concern or care for how far
their actions can coincide with a human.

I know the wind sets everyone free some day
Till then, if you can't play
Learn to accept that such a deal is unacceptable and unfair
Walk away, and let them learn through their own mistakes
Say good bye, for without them, your life is blessed with a new day

I see what you mean

Confessions of a shopaholic sounds so glamorous
Even losing its value of addiction
As opposed to the regular alcoholics and drugaholics .. ( Diction apart )

We find happiness in something which provides a sense of urgency
something all the senses attach themselves to
Much like a foodie who craves the same at anytime

It's like an accessory, or a couture which makes one feel complete
Like the bag you saw in Vogue, the dish that makes your mom's food one apart
The drug which wakes your mind, or the drink which tops the past

It kinda makes life fun and light, or allows us to change the details
whilst the real life resistance, is put aside

Perhaps we hide from what we have the potential to feel for ourselves
But then the drama would end, and a new journey would begin
It's scary, but I think we all eventually get there

Don't try.. say Good bye

Something can to an end, the day you sat and said I was running from something
Your love had turned off, and you sat and contemplated me

You said I was a lot of different words, to a lot of different people
But I always knew that those were words you created in the midst of such people
I tried to help you see the truth, yet you thought you were betraying me,  whilst
becoming much like the other rose, with whom you lose your scent beauty

And yet at times, I miss you in thought, or departing ways.
But I also see that you chose to go another way. My problem never lied
with the other, it lied with us losing our natural identity
to be the social expectation as is the moulded artificial other,
much like the other roses Serdar talks about who exist to make
roses who are their natural scent value themselves.

It hurts less everyday, and what was an investment, to make you realize
fades away, as I see everyone gets what they deserve.


As for the words with which you described me in 2008 and 2009, the ones you also used the last time I met you which had no scent, I quote Serdar, 'A rose is a mirror to another rose; when one looks at the other, she either sees her own scent or lack of it.'

I want to change

If I dream about you, does it mean you'll appear into my life
Will my subconscious predict your appearance
or will I simply understand a question that my learning resisted to ask

When you come into my dreams, it's not your face, body, or personality that I remember
But rather, your feeling, the way you looked, your actions and behavior care
You usually leave me something, that adds to my security
and yet you balance it with something, that lets me see your flawed beauty

How could this be, a clash between the first and the second
When the first is aiming to be comprehended
and the second, simply being surrounded by where I love to sit free

And yet you both have your own ways, one full of my memory pictures
and another some sort of respective loyalty

The mystery which was rare, becomes a normal living
The mystery simply loses its need for air, and regains a sense of creativity

You see, when you really are rare, you are yourself
You create, attract your wants, and gain stability

This is me, becoming part of humanity, the one I love.

You don't know..

I see your broken heart shining through
I think I'll cry power, and set you free
Oh wait, what a joke! I'm the one who will get some emotional security

I know your in pain, but wait a minute, so are we
Why not use your pain to comfort as emotional intimacy
The one we don't share, but the one you give away so easily

I simply want to win, it's only a game
I think I have power, for I have the intention of gain through pain
You probably will forgive me, or discard it as insecurity
Yet I will continue trying, l don't stop
because I have nothing to lose

You might appear strong, but I know your secret
You broken heart is a sensitive shell
You won't be strong for long, I will be the victorious and make you weak

Oh yes.. it's worked!. 'You just don't care about anything.'
It's like you don't even realize your defeat
Wait a minute, she's gone. I don't understand
Now I will be naive, and tell the world your gone
they won't know how many times I tried to disarm
And soon I'll find someone else to prey
for happiness is external, my vanity, my ego, my looks, the attention men give me

And if anyone asks, I'll pretend I didn't fool, hurt, or manipulate anyone
I'm just a dove, oh come rescue me

I resist change

I'd like to take you somewhere, deep down, where your dreams begin to come to life
and your worries begin to fade like the knowingness that is in your mind

It will happen slow, yet don't worry, when your done you'll learn lessons that were meant to be
They will set you free, and slowly you'll be alive, like the love that is real,
the one I have for you in mind

Let me see, where shall I begin, down south, up north, every part of you goes in the same wind
And now I'm done, I will be your fee.

Oh, you're funny. You really thought I would fall in love with you
I think I'm right, and your nothing but a power tool.

So go home tonight, sleep well. I decided, of you I wouldn't take care
Oh yeah, should have mentioned it before. Slipped my mind, don't worry
you're not alone, perhaps number 143